New iPhone Revealed!!

According to numerous unnamed sources (who absolutely know Apple’s utmost secrets), the next iPhone will be called either the iPhone 5, the iPhone 4S, the iPhone 4GS, or maybe just iPhone. It will either be completely redesigned or look exactly the same. It will definitely be thinner, wider, or the same size. Sources confirm a larger screen, or perhaps not. The camera may or may not have more megapixels, and the antenna band simply has to change. After all, no one bought the iPhone 4 due to its faulty antenna. In fact, Apple will probably start selling an iPhone nano or even a prepaid 3GS to get the prices down. Everyone knows that Apple loves to sell outdated hardware for cheap! One thing is for sure: the next iPhone will be either black or white, and in all likelihood will contain glass, plastic, aluminum, steel, liquidmetal, silicon, or some combination of the above. The release date has been narrowed to September, October, or sometime next year.

All I know is that Android fans will hate it.

I sincerely thank Chinese case manufacturersWall Street analysts, and all other mysterious “informed sources.” Also thanks to Dave Caolo for getting me in the mood to write this.

The entire post is sarcasm except for crediting Dave Caolo. Just in case.


One Comment on “New iPhone Revealed!!”

  1. […] New iPhone Revealed!! – I had fun with this one. Every iPhone rumor I could find, mashed into one phrenetic post. I turned out to be about 50% right. […]

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